The expert

Bernie has been at work since four o’clock. This week on Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. His shifts change from time to time. Simply 42 hours a week.

His areas of expertise are cleaning, disinfecting, wiping down, polishing to a high shine and disposing of waste. He’s a professional: meticulous, thorough, reliable, punctual, prudent, unobtrusive, never a nuisance, friendly (if anyone happens to speak to him by mistake) and nothing is ever too much for him.

He cleans surfaces of dirt, grease and spilled beer, urine in the dark corners, and dirt tracked in from various places on the floors. He’s, so to speak, well-versed in all cleaning products. He knows his way around cleaning products, from gentle to aggressive, and doesn’t let himself be talked into anything by advertising slogans designed to charm housewives.

He even has a solid grasp of the fine art of window cleaning. After all, a distant relative in the USA had founded the world-renowned company ‘Amazing View, Swiss Quality Window Cleaning’.

He clears away discarded packaging (much of it plastic), empty bottles (glass and PET), discarded face masks (still happening) and cigarette butts (even in non-smoking areas). He takes note of abandoned pushchairs (very rarely) and collects scarves, gloves, wrist warmers and football caps left lying about (quite frequently). Sometimes he takes something for himself that he can use at that moment, but never anything valuable such as jewellery, watches or full wallets. Even when it comes to ID cards, credit cards or firearms (also rare, but increasingly so), he knows exactly where to hand them in.

There is still much more to say about him. For example, his cooperation with the police, the ambulance service and the fire brigade when, at the start of his shift, he comes across people sleeping on benches, drunkards, people suffering from hypothermia or suspected saboteurs.

Bernie is undoubtedly one of the most trustworthy and reliable professionals in the city.